Ever since I was young, I have wanted to have a younger brother.
And there is a Chinese friend who desperately wished he had an older brother.
My meeting with him began when I posted a job ad on Danggeun Market(Korean society APP) to improve my Chinese conversation skills more quickly. He had just finished his undergraduate studies at a university in Daejeon and was studying Korean; a mix of proper suspicion and proper tolerance brought us close, and during a Chuseok holiday, I accepted his invitation to spend a week with him in Laiwu, Jinan, and Tai’an in China. Then, one evening during the trip, while heavily intoxicated, we had a conversation that began with “One autumn” and ended with “It is a sad story.”
One autumn, after finishing a tour of the Confucius Temple and hiking Mount Tai, we were having a drink at a local restaurant in Tai’an for our last night together. He told me that even the food his ex-girlfriend made for him was just as delicious. He said she was very beautiful, had loved me sincerely, and was now married to another man with a child. Just as I was teasing him about his past shabbiness, he said, “The grandfather I met the other day covered most of the expenses for this trip.” (In reality, he paid for most of the travel costs.) He explained that his paternal side, whose ancestors had been high-ranking officials since his grandfather’s time, managed the local banks and agricultural products, and that after retirement, they would receive a house and a substantial pension. In contrast, she, being from the rural town, felt she would have to take responsibility for her parents in their old age.
The father and son clashed intensely. As expected, what power could a long-distance couple in just early twenties, studying abroad with their parents’ support, possibly have? I wondered why he used to play breakup songs so loud whenever we passed through her city on the highway. His final lament was that “things would be different if I had a brother,” and I ended the conversation by saying, “I will be your brother whenever you need a break.” It is a truly unfortunate story.
Another truly unfortunate incident occurred in China. Prior to that, during a business trip to China, I happened to attend a jazz concert at a historic local venue. The musicians, vocals, and stage design truly strived to express Jazz with sincerity. The song selection was also excellent, featuring popular hits like “Fly to the Moon” and “Loving You,” as well as a ‘La La Land’ medley. However, the problem was that the performance took place in China.
It seems there are forms of love and beauty in the world that are difficult to reconcile.